Happy weekend Ladies!!
Whatchou lookin’ at??!!
Everyone likes people watching right? I am with two of my friends at an outdoor place for lunch in Huntington Beach. A really beefy guy with no shirt on walks by (we are at the beach after all) and my friend says to the other “Oh, here comes one.” The other friend turns around, looks and says “Wow.” They exchange an excited look with each other, having both appreciated the beefcake. These two friends happen to be gay men, and also a couple. Hmmmm..
This has me confused. Now, if I was with my husband and he told me to check out a hot chick, I would be completely offended. How DARE he salivate over this woman AND expect me to admire her too?? He knows he would be in so much trouble I would want to hit him over the head with my purse, or a rock, or be like Cher in “Moonstruck”: and slap him and say “Snap out of it!!”
Why is this acceptable in the gay community? I have seen it many times where a gay couple is out and about and literally STARING at other men. Blatantly and often making comments to their partners. And these are couples who have been in long-term, monogamous relationships. Where is the jealousy and where is the respect?
Me and my ex-boyfriend in college would spend hours sitting outside at the Armani Café in Boston people watching. We called it “playing tennis” since your eyes would go back and forth. It was all in good fun but I can tell you that I did not love the fact that I knew he was checking out cute girls. Neither of us ever made comments unless it was to point out some horrible outfit or mullet or rather large woman in a small dress (sausage). And neither of us ever looked at anyone for longer than a moment.. or two. I KNOW my husband looks at women. I’m not a moron. And I definitely check out guys. I will tell you that I thoroughly enjoy my morning walks with Miss Winnie where we see many surfers heading to and from the water. In the summer, it is particularly yummy eye candy.
But it is an unwritten rule that you do NOT make it obvious when you are with your significant other. You would not want to hurt their feelings, giving the impression that you have the hots for someone else or are fantasizing about screwing someone else. That is just plain rude.
AND, for some reason, my gay friends LOVE to stare and comment about men when I am in their company. There are times when it is downright embarrassing how they are so obvious in their admiration. Here too, I am confused. I thought you were supposed to be discreet. I definitely see cute guys. I am not blind. But I do not go boy crazy or elbow my friends and say “He’s hot!” or do much of anything except catch a glance out of the corner of my eye and then go back to my life. I may share a look with one of my friends after we both see something particularly studly, but by no means am I getting all flustered and flabbergasted. After all, I am not 15 anymore. Disclaimer – If George Clooney walked by, I may just be a little eensy weensy overboard in my staring. 😉
I do know some women who have no problem with their man ogling some hot babes. I don’t get it. Maybe they aren’t as jealous as me. Maybe they are just okay with it and don’t see it as disrespectful. Maybe they are not okay with it, but just don’t say anything. Maybe I’m an old bitty.
Please understand, I am not trying to be mean or say bad things about my gay friends. I love them all and respect them. And I know they do this eye play all in good fun and are not trying to hurt anyone. I am just trying to figure out this phenomenon that plays out time and again and leaves me confused. Don’t they get offended when their partner ogles some young stud? Do they not know it is impolite to stare? What am I missing??! Is it because I’m a stupid straight woman? HELP!
Someone please enlighten me!!!
Here are a couple more I don’t mind staring at: