HI LADIES!!

THINGS I WISH I HAD KNOWN

Shoulda, coulda, woulda. How ironic that it takes age to gain the wisdom of understanding important things. That’s all well and good, but unfortunately, many of those things could have been really helpful oh, say about 20 years ago!!!

I don’t have many regrets, but it is interesting to look back and realize what you know now that you wish you knew then.

SAVING AND INVESTING – like duh!!

My father has all sorts of investments and knows a lot about stocks, etc. and so does my mum, but for some reason, they never sat my sisters and me down and walked us through saving, planning, investing, stocks, bonds, everything. It wasn’t until I was FREAKIN FORTY YEARS OLD till I found out some of this important stuff. Ridiculous. Bad daddy!!! Bad mummy! If you have kids, sit them down and explain money to them. Open a savings account for them, give them a budget and help them save and buy the things they want. Buying something that you yourself earned the money for can teach them not only incentive to save money but the value of a dollar. And, teach them about long-term planning. My uncle has sat his kids down well before they were 21 to talk about this stuff. Smart man! I always had a part-time job from the age of 12 (babysitting) up through college and then, a full-time job. Had someone taught me some saving and investing skills, well, I would be a lot better off.

APPRECIATE YOUR GODDAMN BODY

I took my long beautiful legs for granted. I KNEW they were my best feature. Everyone told me. Boys made comments. Women envied. Now, in my 40s, they are still nice legs, but varicose veins and spider veins have appeared like… overnight. Okay, maybe not overnight but certainly gotten more prominent in the past few years. It is so depressing. It makes me cry. It makes me spend a lot of money on airbrush spray tans in the summer. I also had no friggin’ idea that your ass drops. It actually DROPS down, from gravity. WTF Ladies???? How did this happen???? I just could never have fathomed this odd act of nature. My butt is not where it is supposed to be. I long for my old ass. And don’t even get me STARTED on my droopy eyelids. Thanks a lot mom!

So ladies, LOVE what you have now because dammit all if it don’t get worse.

SAMPLE CAREERS

I wish I had tried different internships and fun jobs. I would have loved to have interned on a movie set, or for a big celebrity agent. There is no way in hell I would do that now. I mean, I could not be a pee-on, taking bullshit from everyone, kissing ass and getting paid a paltry sum. But in my early 20s, oh it would have been fun!! I also love cooking and food, so being low on the totem pole in a professional kitchen or working for a caterer when I was a young gal would have been exciting. Now, well…… I can barely take the pressure when cooking for a dinner party! I also wish I had worked at Club Med or a cruise ship for a bit. It would have been so “Love Boat” or “Cocktail.” I just KNOW I would have met someone exactly like Tom Cruise. I swear to god (can’t even believe I am admitting this) that my friend and I would talk about running away to join Club Med like it was the circus. And we were 30 when we talked about this!! We were disenfranchised, overworked and underpaid PR gals and going through a quarter-life crisis. Never did do anything about that. One GOOD thing you learn as you get older is to just deal and be happy with what you got.

BABIES

I wish I had had a baby before 35. But some things you just can’t control – well,  I guess you could, but I wanted the Fairy Tale with the Prince and all (apparently I’m on the late bloomer track). Oh well.

VOLUNTEER

I should have done Peace Corps or Habitat for Humanity for a summer. My parents would have helped me out if they knew it was for a good cause. And what better time than during college when you are not in the real world just yet? I would have loved to have been sent to some foreign land, getting my hands into something that would make a difference. I also wish I had volunteered at soup kitchens and places like that more. It’s so hard to do now with the busy, busy lives we all have, but I am doing my best.

LAUGH

I wish I had realized how many happy-go-lucky times I had. I laughed so much!! Now, I may go a couple days without laughing. Can you imagine??!!! That’s just inexcusable!!!

MEN

Oh boy! Where do I begin? I wish I had known that it is up to ME to set the tone of how a man should treat me. And here I thought that they were just supposed to know better and do the right thing. Hilarious. I thought they knew that they were supposed to call when they said they would, pay for the date and not try to jump my bones immediately. I was so clueless! Unfortunately ladies, you have to set the tone. Let him get away with murder, and there will be bloodshed everywhere. Complaining that he never takes you out? Well, that’s because you allow him to just come over and sit on your couch drinking your booze. Of course, a man’s character is something that can’t change. He has to be a good person to begin with. I am lucky that my husband knows how to respect a woman and say “Yes Dear.”

And I REALLY wish that I had known that love is not supposed to be hard. You are not supposed to have to EARN their love. They are just supposed to love you, as is. You are not supposed to have doubts all the time of “where is this relationship going” or “How does he feel about me?” You are not supposed to be wondering all the time if you love them or not. If this is you, RUN AWAY! Not the right guy. I am one to talk since I had severe panic attacks when I met my husband. I was scared to death. I knew he was the one, but allowing myself to give my heart to someone and trust they wouldn’t stomp all over it was tough. It had been a REAAAAAAALLLYYY LOOOOOOONG time!!

That’s all the insight I have for now.

Oh – and you know you are old when it takes 15 minutes every morning to take all your damn vitamins! HELLO GOLDEN GIRLS!


STAY YOUNG AT HEART LADIES!