Hello Fashionable Ladies!
Are you as vexed as I am about some of the fashion trends that we have? I am. On a daily basis. I am amazed and astounded about people’s fashion choices. I am all for individuality and doing something a little funky, but there are trends that were WAY over before they began. I think. In my opinion.
The nice thing about getting older is that you don’t fall into the trend trap as easily as we used to, right? I hope so ladies! I myself stay far away from certain things. I look Maxi in the Maxi dress so I will say No Thank You. And the 5-inch heels? Well, besides my stripper shoes for S Factor class, I stick to a 3 inch. I like to walk fast and I’m kinda clumsy. So I ask you ladies to use your common sense when it comes to jumping on the bandwagon. I mean, did you really need the Jennifer Aniston Friends cut? Probably not.
Here are a couple of my least favorite trends right now:
DUKES MAKE ME PUKE!
Jean short shorts are a very hard thing to pull off. Even celebrities, with their perfect bodies and perfectly applied airbrush spray tan can look trashy in this little jean item. And the tops that people pair them with? C’est dommage! The most common offense to me is the jean short with the bikini top. I know Katy Perry made them sound cool in her California Girls song with her Daisy Dukes, Bikinis on Top!, but let’s get real, it ain’t happenin’ for most of us. And to wear teensy jean cut off shorts if you are over 30? That my dear ladies, should be a criminal offense! I myself wore Daisy Dukes back in the day with my red cowboy boots and hey, I was young and everyone else was wearing them and no, I don’t have any pictures so don’t ask.
HAIR-TASTROPHY
I talked about this in my news blog using Paris Hilton as an example. I’m not sure when this hippie, flower child accessory is a good idea. Maybe at a theme party, or when you are at the Roller Disco in your dolphin shorts. I just don’t know. But many people think it’s cute. I feel like it’s been a trends for quite some time now, at least in Hollywood, but I was never into it. At least not since the 80s. Whatev.
SPEAKING OF HAIR –
What’s with the feather in the hair thing? I mean, I thought it was kinda cool till the trend lasted like 2 seconds. Now every mall and little hair shop in America is putting feathers in people’s hair and I’m already over it and people are saying the trend just started! I think I will stick with the feather earrings for now. At least I can take them off and not look like everyone else for a second.
SPEAKING OF EVERYONE ELSE-
They are UGHS not UGGS. I am proud to say that I have never, and hope to NEVER own a pair of Uggs. God this trend is awful, and it won’t go away. Uggs were smart. They gave a ton of pairs away to celebrities and the celebs thought, well hey, these are kinda comfy. So they wore them and then everyone from Seattle to Oklahoma to Miami wanted Uggs. And Uggs was happy to sell their cumbersome boots to them. You see college girls wearing them with their Victoria’s Secret PINK across the bum sweatpants (by the way, I am SO mad at Victoria’s Secret for ruining pink that way!). You see celebrities wearing them with well, everything. I have seen MALE celebrities wearing them. It is so cruel. My eyes still hurt. It’s particularly hilarious to see UGGS in L.A. since I think of them as a cold weather shoe and it will be 90 and some girl at Starbucks is flipping her hair and talking on the phone, shuffling around in her shorts and Uggs. I mean, Uggs are bad enough but Uggs with shorts?! Sacre bleu!! Now they are coming out with more styles and totally annoying me.
SOCK IT TO ME –
I wore tube socks. Sure. For sports. With my sneakers. Athletes wear tube socks. My husband wears ‘em for tennis. But if he were to wear them for a non-athletic occasion, I would have to gasp and send him right back to the bedroom to change. No way José. I know that the Mexican community has been wearing this for a long time and I just have to say that I think it’s time for a change, don’t you? I don’t mean to make fun of the culture – hell, every culture’s got some bad fashion choices – hello tube top! But it really doesn’t make any statement except that maybe you have psoriasis and don’t want anyone to see, or weak calves maybe? I don’t think so. And how about the fact that they are sharing this sexy look with old tourists? Oh yeah, you’ve seen the old guy wearing the tube socks and shorts pulled up way over his belly button. And ladies, what’s with this sporty look that you think is a win when it comes to fashion?! It’s not. It is as bad as the Norma Kamali sneaker pump that my mother owned and I was highly embarrassed of for a long time. My sister used to wear little colored ankle socks with her various brightly colored Candies. I really thought she was so cool. At the time. I hope this trend doesn’t come back.
OLD HAT NEW LOOK –
I understand the desire to take something that we use all the time and try to put a new spin on it but spinning the baseball cap around so the bill is in the back is really lame. It can make the hottest guy look like a cheeseball. And when a guy in his 40s does it, well, I just know he is still in frat boy days and STILL thinking he might start a band. Or buy a corvette. Or a hummer. Or just bang some chicks. And doesn’t wearing it backwards defeat the whole purpose of keeping the sun out of your face?! I know many guys have turned it into the instant toupee – it hides a bald spot fast – I once dated a guy who wouldn’t take his baseball cap EVER because he was prematurely balding in his 20s. He even wanted to wear it having sex. But that’s another story entirely. Please, if you see any of the men in your life presenting themselves to the world with this look, just pull the hat off and say “Knock it off Cheez Whiz!”
That’s my fashion report for the day ladies!!
Men who wear hats to “hide the bald spot” are actually contributing to their hair loss because hats constrict the blood vessels that supply the scalp with oxygen and nutrients. Try something else, fellas!